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The Delavigne Corporation Blog

Friday, February 27, 2009

Funky Friday Feedback: Explain yourselves!

Dear employees and blog enthusiasts,

As you may well know, today is Funky Friday, a day on which casual attire is permitted in the offices, and casual swearing is also tolerated within reason. I write to you because today's funky friday involves voting on the funeral for one of our dear staff members.

Here is a reminder of the question posed to our readers:

Sadly, a member of the Delavigne staff has been eaten by a bear! Let's look back at their life and give them the funeral of their dreams! Whose funeral will be taking place in next month's Funky Friday?
Edward Moon, Delavigne's intern and fan of classic British rock and adventure movies, for a budget funeral full of spotty teenagers.
Philip Cheeter, Sales Director and fan of power ballads and fast cars, for a funeral full of weeping blondes.
Brian Jones, Personal Assistant extraordinaire and fan of Elkie Johns and musicals, for a funeral full of red ribbons, white doves, and tears.
Hannah Benedict, Head of Retail and fan of fair trade and folk music, for an environmentally-friendly funeral.

Normally this would be a devastating event, but, as it is funky friday, I'm willing to overlook the tragic nature of this development as well as the wrongful death lawsuit which will likely be filed against me. I do however have a 2-part question for you: Who did you vote for and why?

For example: I voted for Edward because sometimes he mumbles, and I'm not sure he washes his hands after using the toilet.

Please let me know by commenting on this post. Thank you.

Delavigne out.

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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

And the winner is...

Hi everyone,

Jean's away at a Star Trek convention at the moment, so he's asked me to announce the results of our Valentine's competition for him. We LOVED all your entries, and had a good laugh here at the Delavigne Corporation reading them, so thanks a lot to everyone who contributed!

We couldn't pick just one winner, and Jean eventually decided to send all of your letters to Samantha, his now ex girlfriend. She definitely got the message.

The prize for the funniest letter goes to Nadège Ravet. Haha!

The most sincere letter was written by
B. Blel. It brought a tear to my eye.

And the winner of the prize for the strangest letter is glezandrade. Weird!

All the above people will be sent a GymGlish t-shirt and a card entitling someone they know to three free months of GymGlish training!

We also have some honourable mentions, to people who also did very well:

Gee wins the best line prize for his stunning 'Your tang could make them flee to the loo.'

And the short but sweet prize goes to michèle borgomano.

These two great entrants win
a card entitling someone they know to three free months of GymGlish lessons as well as some fun stickers!

Well done everyone!

Winners: to claim your prizes, please write to me at 'support 'AT' gymglish 'DOT' com' with your full name, postal address, and what size t-shirt you'd like!

Once again, thanks to everyone who contributed - you really helped Jean to get out of a tight spot! He's enjoying single life very much, and making the most of his new-found freedom by attending Star Trek conferences and fun things like that.

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Thursday, February 12, 2009

Love trouble: SOS !

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

How can I dump my girlfriend, Samantha?

Polly, Brian and Philip have tried to help me by writing a 'break-up' e-mail, but I'm not impressed. I hope you can do better!

That's right! Write a letter to Samantha for me! Make it as funny, sad, cruel or crazy as you like (remember, Samantha is all of these things and worse) and leave it in the comments below!

The best letter will receive a GymGlish t-shirt (as if helping your favourite Delavigne employee wasn't motivation enough!). Make sure you include your full name and surname in your reply - don't leave the author of the comment as 'Anonymous' otherwise we won't know who to send the t-shirt too!

Looking forward to reading your letters and finally freeing myself from this devil of a woman!



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Dirty little secrets

Alright losers, pop quiz! What has two thumbs and just learned what a blog is?

Here's the answer:

This guy!

That's right you clowns, a petite-sized Frenchman showed yours truly how to sign up for a blog. It took a surprisingly long time, and Jean wanted to give up (in true French fashion), but after 3 and half hours we finally managed to do it. So here I am! This is the place where we post the hot pics of the women we are dating, right?

Just kidding, Luna made me sign some sort of waiver saying that I won't write anything to embarass the company, but that's just a legal document, I'm sure it won't hold up in a court of law.

So what's happening, virtual workmates? Any news from the big Kahuna (Bruno)? Anyone know when he'll be back? I'm starting to miss his dry sense of humor and beautiful pink shirts. Plus the new CEO is a real dweeb (no offense Edward). Alright, I'm off to a sales meeting, but you'll be seeing me around on this blog in the future.

Peace out, clowns!

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Thursday, February 5, 2009

Yellowstone National Park

So, the word's out that we're going to Yellowstone National Park for the staff weekend trip, according to our Funky Friday listeners (more info here)!

I can't bloody wait! All that camping, I love camping! I'm a very camp kind of person. And then there's the fishing, the trekking, the birdwatching, the bearwatching, the bisonwatching, the beewatching.... I'll watch anything that begins with a 'b'.

But really, it's a very beautiful, freethinking place, at least that's what I read in the National Geographic in my dentist's waiting room. Apparently there's lots of geysers, and volcanic activity there. What with all that fresh air, everyone is bound to be a little randy, so I wonder which one of us will be the first to whisper 'Did the earth move for you'???

Does anyone have any ideas on possible activities we could do?
I have a few for starters:
Picnic basket stealing
Car ramming with elks (my favourite)

Get in touch! Through our Facebook page, through the forum, or just reply to this post...

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