The Delavigne Corporation Blog

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The Delavigne Corporation Blog

Friday, May 29, 2009

Devil machine + Funky Friday

Hello computer demons, I am Horatio Oléré, and since 2 days, I can using computer machine every day! Today, Bruno ask me to talk about Funky Friday... but I don't want to. I have monkeys and mojitos waiting for me... so i leave you with the question, then I go drink. I remind you, in comment box you say many nice things. Goodbye.

What do Brian and Philip see outside the window?

Remember, this is YOUR choice: no answer is right; no answer is wrong; no answer is too funky!
A medieval knight.
Bruno Delavigne about to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge.
A Police SWAT team encircling Delavigne HQ.
An alien spaceship.

P.S. I am the best blogger. You must agree in comment box.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Answers, answers, answers (at least some)

Wow, what an amazingly creative bunch of questions! Sorry for not answering sooner, I had a quite unbelievable amount of washing to do for Bruno after his washing machine broke down. That man must have the biggest sock collection ever, it was a herculean task to get them paired back up together.

Anyway here goes....

Jess said: I want to know if Bruno has a girlfriend! And I also want to know his salary. Thanks

So Jess. You want to know if Bruno has a girlfriend. Hmm, well, I'm not really sure if I'm the best person to ask about this, since I've often been known to spit at any girls that come anywhere near him. Currently I believe he's single, though he knows that special someone in his life is just an intercom button away.
As for his salary... Somewhere between 1 dollar and $200 million.

Gee said: As we have the floor to ask questions of any kind about anything, how stupid should we be not to pounce on the opportunity. Here are some questions that have been burning the tip my tongue for some time yet:
*About Brian Jones

Why does a British gentleman as Brian leave his pants on the floor of the meeting room when he gets doing his daily workout?

Gee, your questions were perplexing, but I'm glad you got into the Q&A spirit. Luckily Sandy was able to follow your meandering line of thought and provide a correction.

I can answer the only one I understand, that which mentions my underpants...
My underpants have done a tour of Delavigne. After I accidentally left them on the back of a chair to dry off after a grueling pilates session in the meeting room, they must have been noticed by Edward (who was hiding in the wardrobe) and who gave them to Donna (in return for a peck on the cheek). She in turn sold them to Susie, who gave them to Polly as a birthday present. Polly locked them in her desk, but Giuseppe (Horatio's monkey) found the key and took off with them. Giuseppe wore them for 3 days solid before losing them during a strip poker game with Horatio. I believe that's where they are currently: being used to filter Horatio's essential perfume oils. I'm glad they've found such a worthwhile home.

I'll pass on the rest of your questions to the members of staff. Perhaps they'll have better luck deciphering them! But thank you all the same, it's great to know we have such a wacky band of followers....

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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Questions, questions, questions

Not a lot of user activity on our blog. So, I have a question for you all:

Do you have any questions that you want to ask us?

It could be anything, here are some recent ones:

* Where do baby pigeons come from?
(Jean tells a great bedtime story that answers that one)

* What did Edward Moon do before he came to Delavigne?
(Some say he was a part-time magician and studied Anticonformism at the Freddy Mercury School of Rock, I'm sure we'll soon know the truth)

* What is a split infinitive?
(You should totally see the latest Star Trek movie to find out)

* What is this lion doing here?
(I don't know, but he looks like he doesn't want to be disturbed)

We'll try and do a monthly Q&A session if there's a good response. And we'll do our best to answer all questions (within reason).
So get asking, people!

Love, peace, and bacon grease,
Brian Jones

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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Coming soon: little pricks for all men

For years there have been rumours of a form of hormonal birth control for men, along the lines of the pill for women. These rumours have flared up again recently, and an injection seems to be on its way. You can read more here.

My questions to you are: women, would you trust a man to take this contraception? Men, would you be willing to take this contraception? All, any other thoughts?

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Thursday, May 7, 2009

Delavigne Corp 2.0

Any tweeters out there?

I suspect that some of you tweet. I can't be sure of course, but some of my sources have informed me that those of you that are media savvy and technologically-inclined are using this thing. Well here I am to announce that you can follow my tweets here:

For the bookers of faces:
Find me and selected staff members of the Delavigne Corporation on Facebook:

You'll add me as a friend if you know what's good for you.

See you on the World Wide Web, Internauts!