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The Delavigne Corporation Blog

Thursday, October 27, 2016

Help me Brian May. You're my only hope!

Dear Brian May,

I'd obviously love to be addressing this to Freddy, but he's dead. So it falls to you Brian May, the frizzy-haired guardian of the Queen legacy.

I imagine you may have heard Dumb Prank's new hit Bacon and Eggs?  It goes: bacon and eggs... bacon and eggs... bacon and eggs... It's sometimes referred to as 'the song with really good lyrics'.

I'm sorry to have to tell you that this song was stolen from me by a French arnaquer called Guy DuPuy (or Guy le bastard, as I now call him). He's the short one from Dumb Prank (he looks marginally more ridiculous than the tall one). 

I don't want music royalties or anything, but could you find it in the goodness of your heart to round up some of your musician mates and give Dumb Prank a good kicking?

Rick Astley
Kemp Brothers (Spandau Ballet)
Image result for rick astley
Image result for kemp brothers
blows to stomach More comprehensive beating away from eyes of public

I was thinking Eric Clapton could hold GuyDePuy while you or maybe Rick Astely punch him in his fat Camembert belly. Then Tony Hadley from Spandau Ballet could get him in a headlock (careful, this Gallic swine probably bites!) then the Kemp brothers (from the same group) take him outside for a proper going over. It would be perfect justice dolled out from the hands of the greatest musicians in my record collection. Do you think you could make it happen?        

Failing that, how about a music collaboration? I'm pretty sure together we could come up with something that would blow Bacon and Eggs out of the water. I'm actually working on a new song, it's called - Scones and Jam. The public have had it with breakfast inspired songs - afternoon tea is definitely where things are going.

Anyway, I know you're busy protecting badgers and your astronomy takes up a lot of time. But do not hesitate to post some sort of coded message on your official website, Brian May, after you have given Guy DuPuy the duffing up of his smelly life.

Thanks in advance.

Much love,

Edward Moon
(uncredited author of international hit, Bacon and Eggs)


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