The Delavigne Corporation Blog

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The Delavigne Corporation Blog

Thursday, August 24, 2017

Soggy messages in broken bottles

Hello everyone,

You'll be happy to know that your favourite intern has been promoted! Actually, it's not really a promotion, I'm just looking after the 'mail' while Polly is on holiday.

We receive all sorts of things, letters, parcels, pizzas, that sort of thing. But the most unexpected delivery - we seem to be getting quite a few messages in bottles running ashore at the office. Weird, right?

I've managed to carefully open the bottles by smashing them on the floor (despite the manual dexterity that my guitar playing affords me, my hands are far too weak to pull a cork out of a bottle). Once open, or lying on the floor in a million pieces, it's quite hard to read the soggy notes that were held within. All I can see is it is from someone in a British refugee camp in France. They are being horribly tortured, having to drink tea instead of coffee. The name at the end is always partly smudged and difficult to decipher: I can make out a 'BRI', or an 'A', then just a 'RIAN' in the last letter written in brown felt-tip on toilet paper. I have absolutely no idea who these mysterious bottles are from, but I'm pretty sure they are a pervert and I hope they will stop soon. I've disposed of all the bottles and seaweed and wet letters in the bin. That's what Brian would have done. I wonder how he's doing by the way?

Anyway, all this talk of messages in bottles has got me thinking of Message in a Bottle by The Police. It's strange how my mind makes connections sometimes. Sting might not be the nicest human being, but boy can he write a hit song!

For those who don't have a music O level, a quick summary. The lively C#minor verse structure modulates into a very exciting G major pre-chorus, building to a climax in E minor, which then exquisitely lands back in the tonic for a remarkably minimalist chorus, gently bobbing on the sea like a bottle returning to the surface for air. But don't take my word for it, listen below!

Until next time!